A skill that should be taught since kindergarten.
This is the skill of living with your emotions – one of the first stages of the formation of emotional intelligence. It is sad that society often talks about the intellect of the mind and supports its development in every possible way, but they forget about the emotional one.
As a result, we turn out to be such “tadpoles” who are afraid of their own emotions, suppress them, or, on the contrary, hypertrophy. As a result, we do not understand why they (emotions) are needed at all. So, how to form the skill of living emotions.
- When a feeling or emotion comes – we note and name it: “I feel anger/fear/shame, etc.”. If this is difficult, note what is happening to your body. For example: “I have tension in my abdomen and my jaw is tightening, it feels like anger”.
- Do not get involved in the emotion, but do not “leave” it to its fate. We address it with interest and explore it: “Where is this emotion in my body? What is its shape? What color is it? Density? Is it moving or not?”
- Connect the external background: “Yes, I am scared now, but there is life around me – I see clouds outside the window, a cat is walking in the yard, my child is playing in the other room, etc.”.
- We breathe. Notice the emotion, notice the background and breathe with a longer exhalation. A couple of minutes and your emotion will go down.
Most likely, if you just started doing this, the emotion may return. Just repeat the whole cycle again and again until it is enough.
The formation of the skill takes quite a long time, from a month onwards. And when comes dealing with emotions, is a lifelong action. The more often you practice, the better and more automatic it will be. It’s just like in normal work.
It is for the development of emotional intelligence that we have created the EQ.APP application.
Join and develop yourself.