If you want the interlocutor to understand you better, clearly indicate your intentions. This will allow us to better understand “who needs it”, as well as to prevent any
manipulations and simply practice tracking one’s language when speaking. And we often think of the interlocutor instead of clarifying his vision of the situation and his intentions. It is especially important to understand the intentions before taking any decisive action.
“I love the movie Eat Love Pray so much and Julia Roberts is so beautiful there.
Do you want to talk about it? Do you want to know if I want to see this movie? Do I need to download this movie? Or if you already have it on your computer, just to remind you that we wanted to watch this movie together?
“My groupmate called me today, she has terrible problems with her husband…”
Is it bothering you, do you want to just talk it out? You want to ask my opinion, what to advise her in this situation? Do you want me to hug you and tell you I love you?
“For some reason, I woke up at 5 in the morning, then I couldn’t fall asleep for a long time…”
How can I understand you? What do you mean, “I want to sleep more”? Or “Excuse me if I’m a little sleepy during the day”? Or “Please make breakfast for me?”
Learn to speak in such a way that people clearly and understand what you want from them.
If possible, explain whether you have a request or suggestion. “I have a request for you.” “Listen, there is an interesting proposal…” And if you have a protest or demand, then mark it as such: “I object, I am against!” or “I have a request for you.” It is not obvious that you will be obeyed, but at least your intentions will be clear.
At work: “I’m here for your advice”, “I want to ask you for help”, “I need 5 minutes from you, I want to agree with you on my plan of action”.
In a relationship: “Do you have time? I just want to chat with you about anything” “I came to argue.” “I would like you to apologize to me”, “I missed you so much, I want to kiss you”, “I have a serious question for you, please include a business format!”
Sharing is about nothing…
The language should be reasonable.
Any statement should be targeted and appropriate.
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